Vernon Wright - October 13th, 2008

On my Game Boy is a worn out sticker of a Slime from Dragon Warrior Monsters by Akira Toriyama. That little dudes' smile got me through some rough days.

 === Credits ===
Produced by Halfwit Podcasts ( https://www.HalfwitPodcasts.com ).
Written by Matt Spaziani ( https://vocal.media/authors/matt-spaziani ).
Vernon Wright is voiced by Jonathan Swenson ( https://www.jgswenson.com ).
Based on the journal role-playing game "The Machine" by Adira & Fen Slattery ( https://adira.itch.io/the-machine ).  

Music and sound effects used with Zapsplat Gold, and Ghosthack Music licenses.  

Transcript

Vernon Wright - October 13th, 2008

I think Dennis thinks I’m a little crazy. We had a long day today, so a few of us decided to grab a beer after work. I like the people I work with, but all I could think of was getting home and playing with those pieces again. Dennis noticed something was up, and he asked what was on my mind, and I told him. Maybe I shouldn’t have - it’s a little silly, you know? Spending your evenings just playing with glorified Lincoln Logs? I know that’s not all they are, but I can see how that would sound weird to someone else. He gave me a little shit about it, but in a fun way. I think he means well.

But none of that matters, because there’s even better news! I didn’t break the piece! I examined it again and noticed some dust had caught in the slit that I noticed yesterday, so I used a paper clip to try to clean around the edges, and I applied a little pressure to get one piece, and it activated the click! The accordion was still open from yesterday and immediately retracted in a way that could only be intentional. So I pressed it with the paper clip again, and it clicked again, and I was able to pull it right out. I think it only reacts to small, narrow objects, like the reset button on my old Game Boy. My guess is that I hit a carpet tack when rolling it against the floor yesterday - all the apartments within my budget had something wrong with them, and shitty floors seemed like a good trade-off to not having a roommate.

But hey, it worked out! I probably wouldn’t have figured it out if my landlord actually took care of the place. I immediately set to work using the paper clip on the other wooden parts, and finding the slits was easier than I expected. They’re hard to see, but sharp objects seem to catch on them, the same way my fingernail caught on the first one I found. So I took the tip of the paper clip and held it against the wooden pieces while rotating them, and I found a lot more. Most of the wooden parts have at least one, but some of them have two or three. And that’s assuming I found all of them - it’s entirely possible I missed some.

But what’s interesting is that they’re not all the same. Several of the pieces have an accordion, like the first one, but the others are even more bizarre. One was a long chain of intricate wooden pegs, all interlocked by minuscule dowels, and another slit revealed a two-pronged piece of metal that I’m pretty sure is magnetic.

Either way, it’s pretty safe to assume that this isn’t just some homemade heirloom. It has too many mechanical parts for it to just be a toy or crib. I think it’s some kind of machine. What it does, I have no idea, but I know I’ll keep working until I find out.

All right, that’s enough for tonight. I’ll have to pass on the good news to Dennis in the morning.

"This Machine Belongs to" is a production of Halfwit Podcasts. This episode was written by Matt Spaziani. Vernon Wright is voiced by Jonathan Swenson. Based on the journaling game "The Machine" by Adira and Fen Slattery.

If you'd like to support our endless toil with the machine or listen to our other podcasts, visit HalfwitPodcasts.com, or find specific links in the show notes of each episode. 

Lastly, the most efficient way to build The Machine is by telling friends of its importance in our once meaningless lives. Some day, This Machine could belong to you.